Ashley Quotes Things – Einstein’s Beach House by Jacob M Appel

This is a fun little feature where I share some of my favorite quotes from books I’ve loved. Hopefully, they’ll give you an idea if this is the type of book for you or not. Consider it a formal recommendation and an attempt at enticement.

Today I’ve chosen to pull quotes from Einstein’s Beach House by Jacob M Appel, which is actually a collection of short stories based in magical realism. (I’ll state which story each quote is from within the post.)

I received a free copy of this book in exchange for review, and I absolutely loved everything about. I highly recommend you check it out!



Synopsis taken from Goodreads:

A couple adopt a depressed hedgehog; a mother is seduced by the father of her daughter’s imaginary friend; a man kidnap’s his ex-wife’s pet turtle. In eight tragi-comic stories, Einstein’s Beach House: Stories features ordinary men and women rising to life’s extraordinary challenges.


From “La Tristesse Des Hérissons”


“Love sometimes requires a willingness to indulge unreasonable requests.”


“I was far too smashed to feel much pain, but I could sense the warmth of the blood trickling down my wrist and under my sleeve. I suppose the blood reminded me of how close we all are to the abyss, how easily a guy can step over the edge. It was the blood that kept me from letting go, that kept me clinging to that hedgehog for dear life.”

From “Strings”


“Trust me, honey. It’s much better to not be okay when you ought to be fine, than to be perfectly content when you really should be falling to pieces. The people that nothing ever fazes are the ones who truly frighten me.”


“Her husband was smiling at her, his face open and innocent and loving. Not the look of a dreamer, by any stretch, but an ordinary kind of wonderful.”

From “Limerence”


“I keep hoping if I describe her enough, she’ll be real to you…but it doesn’t work that way. If you haven’t met someone, they can never be real to you.”


“He had spoken of Lena in the past tense, and somehow that seemed fitting, as though she had already evaporated into memory.”

From “Einstein’s Beach House”


“I know the precise location because in 1978, long after the physicist’s beach house had been demolished for condominiums, the American Automobile Association’s state guidebook listed the address as 2467 South Ocean Avenue–which happened to be the street number of an eleven-year-old girl named Natalie Scragg who planned on becoming the nation’s first female astronaut.”

From “Sharing the Hostage”


“And do you know what the judge said? He said, ‘I’m all for equality, but you can’t exactly divide a turtle in half.'”


“I’m grateful that Maddie can find humor in my sister’s illness. Several of my past loves avoided mentioning her at all–as though the less they spoke about Eileen, the more likely she was to evaporate. Yet, that was infinitely preferable to the reaction of the aspiring anthropologist I dated at NYU who insisted that schizophrenia was a gift from the gods, and who kept trying to convince me that Eileen’s erratic behavior was ‘a sane response to an insane world.’ I adore my sister, but even she can find the humor in her own antics–at least when she’s on meds. When I told her that I was escorting Maddie to visit Fred, she joked, Why don’t you just steal him?”

From “Paracosmos”


“‘Haven’t I told you not to buy fish with high mercury content?’ he demanded. ‘Do you want to turn your daughter into the Mad Hatter?'”


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Happy Reading!


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